If you're watching your friends get engaged and married, you can probably hear your internal clock getting louder and louder, reminding you that you need to find someone too.
Most times, when you feel rushed into pursuing a relationship, you wind up settling with somebody who doesn't deserve you, just because you felt like you were running out of time. Not cool.
No matter how you have winded up in the relationship you're in now, there are deal breakers that you need to know about and standards that you need to put into place before it's too late.
Here are the top five deal breakers:
They Push Your Boundaries- If your partner wants you to sexually compromise and forfeit your convictions, let them go. You want to be with a person who leads you to the cross, not their bedroom.
They Are Unclear: If they aren’t defining your relationship and you have the awkward thoughts of not knowing what you are, move on. You will never have to chase what God has for you.
Pride: Do they ever willingly apologize or admit that they are wrong? Do they always wind up turning the problem around on you and your shortcomings? If the answer is yes, then remember that Proverbs says that pride goes right before destruction.
They Watch Porn: This will destroy their view on intimacy, love, and you. If they are living in this sin without making the necessary steps to change it, you can do better.
They’re Not Passionate For Christ: The person that you marry should be encouraging you to seek more of God and to grow in holiness. If they barley ever bring God up and you’re the one forcing a godly relationship, then it may be time to rethink it.
And please, remember: Just because someone claims to be a Christ follower doesn’t automatically mean that they are. There is a difference between someone being in church, and someone being in Christ.
You need to watch their actions when they are with you and other people, make sure they are consistent between what they say and how they live, and look for the fruit in their life.
In the end, do not force the relationship if they fall into even one of these deal breakers. It doesn't mean you have to judge them or make them feel bad- but you cannot hang on just because you see potential. You will never get them to change their behavior. Simply recognize that you both are wanting different things out of your lives and give yourself permission to walk away.