This Is Why A Guy Won't Pursue You



Something profound happened today while apple picking with my husband. I thought it would be like any normal day, but it was one for the books. I was able to share the lesson I learned with girls that have been reaching out to me about this issue for years. They appreciated it so much. And if you're anything like them, you'll appreciate it too.

Many girls struggle with wanting to be wanted. They are lonely and tired of waiting for God's best, so usually they just throw their hands up in the air and settle. A few girls are out there that are actually trusting in the Lord to bring them their mate. Still, in the drought, they ask the question "Why Won't Any Guy Pursue Me?"

While on a farm, I found their answer.

Ron and I were holding our bags and making our way to the fun. I stopped right when I saw the first apple tree. I was excited and took the closest one to me off of the branch. It was red, with a few dents, and looked just fine to me.

Ron had kept walking to a tree in the distance and was going through extreme measures to try and get an apple all the way at the top. He was climbing the branches, shaking the trunk, and jumping in the air.

The first thought in my mind was “show off” which was accompanied by a major eye roll.


I get that men love a challenge, but this was totally uncalled for. He interrupted my annoyance with his reasoning.

“Did you know apples at the tippy top are the best ones? They usually are much bigger and tastier.” He said.

Girls... This is it.


This is the BOOM moment.


I had finally understood why he was putting all that work in and all of a sudden, I related it to the pursuits of men and Ron's pursuit of me.

He didn’t want to just take a half rotten, dirty apple that was easy to grab. He wanted to possess the one that he was confident in. He knew that even though it might take a little bit more effort and there would be hardship along the way, he would have the greatest of them all.

It's the same exact thing with you, ladies.


Just because you aren’t loved by a man right now doesn’t mean you aren’t good enough. You are just at the top of the tree and you have to wait for the one that realizes that good things take time.

So the reason a guy is not pursuing you has absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.


As you probably know, too many guys make endless excuses as to why they won't go after you or any other woman, for that matter. They will say that they just aren't "ready" or that they are "unsure".... but, sister, don't buy it. They just don't want to put in the labor.


Don't make yourself fall from the branch just to be picked by them. In other words, don't lower your standards in order to get a shot with them.

If you're ever tempted to, please remember that Christ pursued His bride. Christ gave His all to ransom her and humbled Himself through reckless devotion. You should be looking for nothing less than an earthly man that is willing to do the same. They really are out there.

It's easy to lose hope... I know. I've walked through the singleness season and I've also dabbled in horrible relationships out of frustration of wishing to be cherished. I knew that I needed to give it up and trust Him, because He's never failed me yet. I was on a mission to truly become a woman of God, and through that process, I realized that I was a priceless gem and a daughter of the King.

As long as you are becoming a woman of valor, integrity, and respect- You are too.

Keep your eyes focused on Him, and he will eventually come along. And keep in mind- Nothing is, or ever was, wrong with you.


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